07February Round Up + March Beginnings & Winnings
Okay… So February was a wild month, jam-packed with action and excitement. First with extreme dance parties, rolling with the homies. Also meeting and sleeping with new boys. Hanging out with retro besties and meeting even more new boys.
Last entry I had formed a phone connection with a really cool dude (Tego Escobar). So we finally hung out, group style. His friends and my friends all becoming friends. Meanwhile his friends (although funny & friendly) were not hot at all. And by saying not hot I am being nice, because birth defects are not something to be made fun of.
Anywho, it was a chill situation the energy was low because Escobar was tired. It was one of those situations where you’re dying to relax and showcase your amazing[ness] but you become really self conscious because you want every move to be perceived as cool and awesome. (Because all you want is for this beautiful male specimen to like you and be into you, just THAT into you!) So you spend the night in your head while your bestie shines, because she’s just their for moral support—no pressure on her…Although he has said “lets chill” it has yet to happen again.
Valentine’s Day was spent with the Ex Boyfriend. Fun and comfortable.
Moving right along, later that month, on a girls-night-out the aforementioned bestie and I hit the city! We had several drinks at a fun midtown bar. We were fun, flirty, and laughing. Just havin’ a good time. My gf/ bestie/ bff wants to meet up with this guy she’s talking to so I (take one for the team) and say “yea girl lets!” Not even remotely expecting anything of it. So we wind up at a poppin’ midtown dance club. Its packed, fists are pumping, bodies raging, but our buzz is wearing off. So we wander, we hit the bar, we meet up with her guy Dean* and his bff Jeremy*. Jeremy and I are dancing, the other 2 are dancing and yadda, yadda, yadda we are in fucking Queens?!?!?!?! It was the craziest experience with the moments just whizzing by and oral sex exchanged. Let’s just say the night ended with a very hushed-covert departure from Grandma’s house in Queens. WEIRD.
The final week of February held the most magnificent moments of the month. My best friend from college came to NYC for her birthday. The terrific trio went to Santos and danced the night away with free drinks from rando.s and just an all around good vibes + good times. What augmented the fun of this night was the mucho fun that was had the previous Wednesday. We went to this magazine event, which had free beer and live music. The Artist that performed Porcelain Raft was mesmerizing, but shortly after getting high off beer and new tunes we dashed over to the East Village (from Brooklyn) to see a live performance of Risky Business another below the radar, yet phenomenal group. So the energy and excitement carried over to the weekend.
But HERE is March! At first I was concerned because where was Aunt Flo aka Timmy? I had to reflect on the month and ask myself “Who did I fornicate with and WTF if I am preggers with their fucking baby?!!?!?” Thank the Universe because Timmy arrived.
March I think will be sex free. As long as I stay away from the Ex and the ecs(tasy).
OMG OMG OMG
Exciting news! OMG I can hardly contain myself. So the other night on a 3-11 (pm) shift I get a call from a potential patron asking if we have any suites available. We had 1 available but the price was too high, so in good ole fashion form we began to negotiate and barter.
So for the standard (lower) rate and the promise to enroll in a loyalty program he was going to come in and get the suite. Not long after our agreement had this mystery man (with a great phone demeanor) call back and inquired if the suite was smoking. I regretfully informed him that it was not and he let out a sigh of disappointment because we were tangibly vibing over the phone (and we wouldn’t meet face-to-face if they didn’t book the room). So he tells me that it has to be smoking and he will be booking the room at a nearby hotel that matched him and his friends’ needs.
So, being the clever woman that I am, I deduced (suite + smoking + late night = PAR-TAY). I asked the mystery man with the energetic, blissful tone (which totally brightened up the evening), “Excuse me sir with all due respect you sound like a youth trying to engage in festive merriment this evening, am I right?” Stunned that I was so right-on-the-money, he was temporarily speechless, which made me question my judgement, but all was revealed that a party was about to go down and I was totally invited. He actually asked for my number but I politely declined, “Not before a proper Facebook investigation.” Quickly, I had a new friend “Tego Escobar*”
Thankfully, his hot phone personality and sexy voice matched his face! So after my shift, I went back and forth on weather or not I should attend his telly. I didn’t due to my 7am obligations, but we did have a nice little conversation on the phone again later that night. It was reaffirmed that he is funny, cool, inquisitive, all around awesome! We have a lot in common thus far. I’m excited. Thrilled actually!
We are going to meet up soon, but this is a busy weekend.
Soooo when I told my friend about him she’s responded “You meet soooo many guys.” At first I was taken aback, asking myself “Do I?” And I don’t think I do, because if so…where are my multitude of dates?!?!?! That’s the only reason why I broke up with Zack* to date copiously in my twenties.
Then my friend added “You have a bevy of boys billowing from your bosoms” or something to that effect lol. I enjoyed the alliteration. I need to turn these chance meetings into full blown wine-and-dine sessions. That will be the mission of the week.
*Names have been changed to protect my anonymity :-)*
The Passive Rejection & Unreturned affection.
Another day, another life lesson. Today’s realization: passive rejection and how to cope with unreturned affection.
Allow me to illustrate the setting. NY- tristate region, victim for the 7th time this winter to a blizzard, 65% of the local hotel staff are snow bound at their prospective property. However, this time a lucky girl and a special guy ( who have on a previous occasion succumbed to pleasures of the flesh) are stranded in the same building as opposed to neighboring buildings. So girl sees guy in the lobby on the phone, waves hello because guy is in deep conversation. Girl is acknowledged, texts are exchanged later that evening. In the midst of text communication ( which girl finds odd considering the circumstances, but dismisses her ill feelings), she ventures around the corner to get a soda. In the hall of the vending machine she sees guy chasing another female down the hall, guy seems to see girl but continues to chase other female.
In shock and dismay girl gets soda and returns to the room. She processes what has just happened, confused she shares the happenings with her friend. The friend that braved the hazardous elements to spend the night in this wild blizzard. Anyway, the conclusion the girl comes to is that the guy, despite expressed interest both verbally and physically, has passively indicated that he is not interested. He has said through action that you are rejected!
SOOOOOOOOOOO what do you do when words of someone do not reconcile with their actions? Of course you are pissed, hurt, and all you want to do is want to yell & scream. Instead you have to breathe deep and gain composure.
So I confess I am that girl. The rejected, and how I have decided to deal with the situation is to ignore the rejection and act as though we never liked each other in the first place. We work for the same company after all, and the physical interaction was minimal-one time event. Of course I am hurt but sometimes it is not even worth the trouble. Because ultimately nothing will come of me expressing my hurt and disappointment. He had a choice and he did not choose me. I am fully attune to the fact that you cannot make a guy like you. I am done being confused by this weirdo dude and I am moving the fuck on.
Also I neglected to mention that I was called into work at 3am because the useless night auditor called out. I informed the weirdo to this fact and subsequently after seeing him with another girl he texted “i can’t believe you are going in at 3am, that’s incredible.” Clearly if you’re not acknowledging the passive rejection I won’t (you socially awkward mother fucker). Fast forward to 3am and homie texts “Wake up!” “I did not ask you to be my wake up call jerk,” I think to myself.
This guy is beyond strange and I do not even know why I wanted to share my body with him in the first place.
Also, the girl I think he was with is a fellow co-worker, but I am not quite sure. However, when I tried to confirm her whereabouts via another coworker the info he provided didn’t match up. I think I was being lied to but whatever. Moving forward! On to bigger and better things.
Returning in a timely fashion, ready to discuss lust & passion.
Today’s Topics: Preparation & The Window of Opportunity
Okay so being prepared is advantageous in any situation, however, for a single woman in her prime, it is an imperative! More often than not my carefree, unassuming manner leaves me very unprepared for incredible adventures.
No RD you cant sleep over Mr. Awesome’s because you didn’t pack any make up or big sunglasses for the morning.
No RD he can’t pleasure your breasts orally because you forgot to shave your armpits.
No RD, no cunnalingis for you because you’ve been neglecting your landscaping responsibilities.
In addition to missing out on golden, euphoric opportunities you are not maximizing full confidence potential. This is because you are distracted by all the things you should have done and failed to do, so you do not feel 100%. Not feeling 100% makes you less witty, and less articulate when hotties are trying to engage you with simple banter.
If you want to succeed in life you need to be prepared at all times. Full-face make-up at the grocery store. Dress to the nines at the gym. You never know who you will meet and where the day will take you.
For instance last Monday, a disarmingly charming ginger sparked conversation at the front desk with my friend and I. Fast forward to the end of my shift and we were all getting ready to hit the town! With a continued night of laughter, fun, storytelling, and social lubricants we all found ourselves back in his room…and lets just say yadda, yadda, yadda, we could/ should have been more prepared (in order to maximize fun).
Now onto the the window of opportunity. In my opinion when first fun is had, and connections are shared & expressed you have 5 days to explore what was shared otherwise the window closes. Maybe there will be hang-outs intermittently, however if you don’t strike that iron while it is hot during that 5-7 day window something substantial will not be established.
So luckily for us 2 days after the spontaneous outing, the red-headed traveler found his way back to our little town for round 2 of fun and good times.
On the flip side, weeks prior, a physical interaction was exchanged in an unexpected place, on an unexpected visit to a co-worker. And when follow-up meetings weren’t happening we resigned ourselves to the fact that ‘twasn’t meant to be. Five days had expired and it’s not like we don’t live in the same area or work right next to each other! So that’s a definite indication that it was a one time-heat of the moment, moment. The worst part about it is that is was a measly 2nd base tease! If it was a good hearty fuck I think I would feel more satisfied or least less curious about this coworker.
Back again in the 2010, oh wait ‘11 :-)
Oh geez as many distracted, careless 20-somethings I’ve been inconsistent & inconsiderate with my postings (or lack there of) Not due to lack of inspiration rather an overstimulation! So I return in the 20-11 refreshed and renewed with ample stories to share.
Topics of the Month:
- Recycling! Is it okay to time and time again to return to familiar loins?
- Attempted Facebook Reconnections! The one that got away is now 1 poke away from knowing you’ve never forgotten and is it too late to explore that once shared connection?
So I must admit, I am a chronic recycler. It’s (presumed to be) safe, it is definitely familiar and comfortable. So what if half the time your on the pre-bone date you’re still looking for other prospects? Hey maybe I also suffer from another affliction: chronic dissatisfaction?! I am a victim of gross consumerism. Sex and love are commodities and my appetites are insatiable. ‘Tis the sad reality of my life.
Can I ever completely move on and find someone new if I am still “surf and turfing” with my ex.
Can I really sacrifice incredible sex and connection for the unknown?
Or should I re-enter the relationship, with that lingering longing for something better?
I guess logically if your always searching for something better you will never find it. Although it’s easy to acknowledge how do you extinguish those thoughts and desires? Practice? Therapy? or am I lost cause?
I just want to freeze half of the cake and eat the other half, slowly savoring of course.
Moving on to topic 2.
Circa sophomore year of high school, picture this, honors math (yawn) an olive toned, bright smiled, dazzling long raven haired (upper class-man) Jewish boy strolls in. Completely unaware of the frenzied effect his tie-die shirt was having on my soul, I sat their in awe and full captivated curiosity. During the course of the year, we chatted exchanged CDs, were partners on in-class assignments *swoon*, there was mutual interest! To my astonishment he thought I was pretty, and what did I do nothing, and before you know it I’m out of the math class (due to an undisclosed scandal) and BOOM before the semester ended he vanished. POOF gone, dropped out!
Due to mid-pubesent insecurities and complete fear of not knowing what to do with a boy who actually reciprocates feelings, I missed my chance to explore this connection/infatuation/lust….devastated you move on, because lets face it there are other fish. However, with the advent of Facebook, a global fishbowl I saw to it to cast my pole and search for this missed fish.
So after to much scrolling and only a faint recollection of what his last name would be I found him. Still olive toned, still bright smiled, still dazzling! With less hair :-(, but thats an aging tragedy… anywho, His vibrant soul radiated through every photo, through every smile, every stare, every adventure, and boy has he adventured! Living the life I’m too frightened to live. But as twisted fate would have it, parked next to him in many photos ( too many not reason that its not a lover) he has an F-ing girlfriend! Granted he’s halfway across the world and the chances of us meeting again are slim, a girl can still dream.
Anyway, the dilemma lies in whether or not I send a message or a poke acknowledging that I remember you. Let’s face it he might not remember me because he’s experienced so much living. Also, it’s not like anything would come of my message, right? So I want to send the message. It would be an ego boost for him really, a “Hey, you’re unforgettable, just so you know, Ciao Ciao!”
Hmmm, but if he asks “who are you freak?” or the inevitable and unfortunate question “What have you been up to?” I would be crushed (because I have accomplished little to nothing of what I wanted for myself).
Maybe I will send the message with no expectations, prepared for the worst but hoping for nothing? We shall see.
Its been too long…
…along with infrequent updating my guy situation has remain unchanged for several months now….
I think I’ve lost my mojo. NO MENZ ALL SUMMER, wtf?!?!? Not that I need a man to affirm my amazingness HOWEVER, I do need one to have fun and play with… womp womp.
Actually I may have fibbed, there are 2 boys at 2 different jobs that I work, that have been aggressively flirting with me. 1. I have actually kissed and was surprisingly a a very compatible kisser with me. 2. The other has had a girlfriend for approaching 4 yrs now and whines about her blah blah blah…
So the whiner seemed like a great guy until he started speaking badly about his present gf. SUCH A TURN OFF btw. “She’s beyond lame and void of personality, I’m not happy, its not going to last, yadda, yadda, fucking-yadda…” If your girlfriend sucks so much just fucking break up! It is not rocket science…I am a huge proponent of the pursuit of happiness and things that dont make you happy you must let go! JEEZZZZ… So this whining-girlfriend-trashtalker has, by his own doing, diminished his character and what was once thought to be a stand up guy is now just a cowardly jerk.
Oh well.
I just want to meet someone normal, unattached, fun, humorous, and not a douchebag or 300lbs.
I don’t think I am asking for much.
P.S. can my ex boyfriend STOP trying to be my boyfriend again,thanks.
Long time no Chat.
Sorry about the lack of updates, but I had no material to draw from considering i was out of commission with a cold, followed by a second job that has early bird hrs. Any who there is no real excuse so moving on…
1. Guys with sparse facebook pages: does it really matter?
I say YES, where’s the insight? Where is the personality? Granted you should get to know someone better one-on-one, face-to-face but I LIKE PREVIEWS, so please men get with it, post pics, tag pics, just give me a collection of pics to peruse. Thank You.
2. AWB- acquaintance with benefits… feel free to cut those benefits off at any moment.
3. Its important to acknowledge the brains behind the beauty, and if the beauty is the primary fixation then I’m done with you.
4. Working these 2 jobs—HOTDAMN—drains your libido.
i want to go on a date soon. actually i will wait for menz in cabo.
Ego boost.
“don’t think I havent been craving you.”
Anonymous # 4 states in the midst of an innocent conversation.
Knowing you’re desired is an incredible ego boost, makes you feel powerful. It’s a daily struggle to decide how to use my powers: for good or evil. Muhahahaha. Succumbing to evil might feel like the better choice momentarily (plus its the easier choice to be made) but using your powers for good has more long term benefits.
Song of the moment. Home by Edward Sharpe and the magnetic Zeros. great vibe and even greater lyrics. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjFaenf1T-Y&a=4T2vdgJXvMY&playnext_from=ML
Your Ex Lover is Dead
IDK what it is but sometimes I get the feeling that my ex boyfriend is the only one who will love me the way I wanted; but with that unconditional, unrelenting love comes a doormat and sometimes I just need someone a bit tougher, or rougher around the edges. I’m sure if financial instability wasn’t an issue we would still be together, because we have a tremendous amount of fun together. I would have had to resign myself to the fact you can’t have everything in one person and continue on in an almost perfect union.
Is it delusional to believe you can have it all in one mate or is it delusional not to believe you can?
Any who, the point is sometimes I miss having a boyfriend. Not to discount my new adventures but that certainty of his affections make me feel secure, warm, and fuzzy.
“I can’t quit you!” Is what I find myself saying when we try to carry on platonically. It’s sick and I don’t want to be in the post-relationship limbo where you still hook up but date other people and get upset that your with new people. It’s gross. Can we be mature adults and leave each other alone, until we actually can be platonic friends?
I just want to be done with him.
Dating.
LADIES! The point of dating excessively is to meet new people and gain a refined notion of what you want and need from a mate. Never feel guilty. Your 20s are meant for experimentals and mistakes.
ALSOOOOOO…. when dating never make the mistake of being prematurely seduced by coolness most times than not homie has a cooler, more attractive friend that would have been a bette rsex-mate, or whatever mate…the point is: NEVER BE HASTY.
and on the concluding note…boys, boys, boys, boysssss BOYS I DO ADOREEEEEE!
